As members of a competitive society, parents and teachers often feel that learning to win is an important lesson so children will grow to achieve more in life. In some situations, competing can be a motivating force, but the research actually points to more learning happening (in most skill development) when children engage in cooperative learning than when they compete against each other.
Many years ago, the Caterpillar Cottage teachers and I were pondering together how to manage children's fascination with pretend gun play (or pretend sword play, “pow pow” games etc..) on the playground and in the classroom. Every year, this is a theme that some children introduce and typically it is one that reappears multiple times. This can be difficult because it is the kind of active play that is more likely to lead to misunderstandings and upset.
Our recent P.E.T. workshops have inspired me to reflect on parenting practices and our teacher connection methods at preschool. We all want to give our children the foundation to be confident adults: creative, happy, resourceful problem-solvers, lifelong learners, caring and motivated members of our society. One way we can facilitate that is through understanding and empathy.
Providing open-ended sensory activities with various materials (such as play dough, clay, kinetic sand, puffy paint, ice, cornstarch and water, and many others you have seen at preschool) gives children opportunities for exploration and discovery. These experiences last a lifetime, as what we learn through our senses create powerful memories and understanding of concepts such as melting, liquid, solid, hard, soft, squishy, gooey, color, etc.
The truth is, no matter the amount of expertise, we all struggle from time to time with how best to engage with our children. It can be challenging in the best of times. We wear many hats as adults, we are responsible for so much.
I was contemplating how best to approach my seven year old about cleaning up her room, and this came to me. I decided to share it with you all.
My daughter's room
There are horses on the floor.
One just gave birth.
figures and dolls stand in a circle.
When we think about what we want for our children as they mature into grownups, many things come to mind. Some of these may include health, happiness, strength of character, kindness, traits of collaborating with others, and/or being productive and responsible members of their communities and the world they live in.
Two children are sitting on the floor together, connecting toy rods. They each have a rod, which they are making longer by adding one piece after another to the ends.
Child 1: "I wonder if we have the same amount?"
I want to start this entry with an excerpt from a book MIND IN THE MAKING by Ellen Galinsky, a book focused on exploring children's learning and development from the perspective of current brain research. This section in the book starts with us reflecting on our own experience with patience and focus.
Inhibitory Control (pg. 23)
One of the core pieces of knowledge in the child development field is that children learn best in the context of warm secure relationships. The foundation for this starts at home, with the warm and loving connection of parents and other primary caregivers. Children who feel safe, and are afforded the experience of caregivers who respond and connect about their concerns and challenges, are given the gift of confidence and security in exploring their worlds.
What skills will my child need to succeed in Kindergarten? The purpose of this blog entry is to provide a broad (but not comprehensive) overview of these skills and some more concrete information about how these skills are best supported at preschool and at home.